Great Coaching Doesn't Focus on Giving Advice

Cathie Leimbach • April 26, 2022

A leader’s job is to support their employees to success. This includes ensuring employees are clear on what is expected of them, sharing important information, and developing necessary skills. It also includes providing positive feedback to encourage employees in what they are doing well and to kindly provide corrective feedback to help them perform even more effectively.

Leaders worth following also coach employees from being dependent on them, to being independent, to being interdependent with their colleagues.


Guiding employees to be independent and interdependent requires leveraging their knowledge and skills for diverse tasks and a variety of circumstances. This requires that leaders help their employees expand their understanding of how to apply their knowledge and skills as they are assigned new tasks and asked to work on different challenges. This increases individual job satisfaction, team morale, and organizational results.


Yet, many leaders have a tendency towards micromanagement such as telling people specifically how to do each new task and regularly solving problems for them.  When leaders learn how to support and trust experienced employees to handle day-to-day workplace variables independently, it frees the leaders to support others in developing their capacity and to address higher level tasks.


Let’s explore a coaching approach that positions leaders to develop employee competence and confidence, the precursors for independence, interdependence, and collaboration. When leaders use coaching skills they can guide their employees to reflect on their strengths and growth areas and develop the ability to apply their knowledge and skills in new situations. This involves having frequent 2-way one-on-one conversations with employees using open-ended questions and reflective listening. For example:


The leader:

1.      Asks the employee what specific, measurable goal or end result they are working to achieve.

2.      Restates the end result and checks with the employee if they have accurately understood what they said.

3.      Asks the employee what progress they have made towards this goal and listens carefully to their answer. The leader periodically summarizes what they heard to be sure she is understanding.

4.      Asks the employee what actions they still need to take to achieve the goal, periodically checking she has heard the employee’s intent.

5.      Asks additional questions to guide the employee to listing all of the significant steps required to achieve the goal. Only if the employee is missing critical elements of the work or is stumped, does the leader make suggestions of how the employee might proceed.

6.      If, and only if, the employee cannot fully develop their action plan themselves, asks the employee if they would like a suggestion. Only if the employee says yes, the leader shares their ideas. If the employee doesn’t want suggestions but hasn’t developed a complete plan, then the leader asks the employee to take some time to think about their action plan. Before ending this meeting, the leader asks the employee to set a date, time, and location to reconvene the conversation.

7.      After a potentially successful action plan has been developed, asks what resources, information, training, or help they need to achieve the goal.

8.      Asks how she, herself, can help them. The leader confirms what she will do to support the employee.

9.      Asks the employee to state when and how they should connect for accountability. The leader may need to ask further questions until a specific, feasible approach and time are agreed to. 

 

When leaders support their employees through such a self-discovery process, they build employee confidence and competence, as well as demonstrating that they trust the employee. This leadership style gradually, even quickly, increased employee engagement, morale, and productivity. 

Listening Is Key to Effective One-on-Ones

By Cathie Leimbach • September 15, 2026
Tom walked into his one-on-one feeling relieved. For a week, he had been struggling with two critical assignments. His supervisor had delegated them without much context, and Tom wasn’t clear about the desired results or how to get started. Surely, he thought, we can sort this out today. Fifteen minutes later, Tom walked back to his desk just as confused. His supervisor had done nearly all the talking—reviewing priorities, sharing updates, and reminding Tom that the two assignments were important. But he never asked the question Tom needed to hear: “What do you need from me to be successful?” When One-on-Ones Become One-Way Conversations This happens more often than we might think. Leaders enter one-on-ones with a list of things they need to communicate. They talk through the list, ask if there are any questions, and move on to the next meeting. But a one-on-one should do more than transfer information. Its purpose is to help the employee succeed. That requires conversation—and conversation requires listening. Ask what the employee wants to discuss. Listen for what is getting in the way. Do they need clearer expectations? More training? Better resources? Help making a decision? Encouragement that they are headed in the right direction? Then determine together what each of you will do next. Try This in Your Next One-on-One Instead of starting with your agenda, begin with one simple question: “What would be most helpful for us to talk about today?” Then listen. You may discover that the most valuable thing you contribute to the meeting isn’t what you say. It’s what you learn. Conversation is Where Leadership Happens™ If this has you thinking about the conversations you have with your team, join me at the Workplace Conversation Clinic on September 21 . Bring a question about your one-on-ones or a conversation you’re finding difficult, and let’s work through it together. RESERVE YOUR SPOT HERE

Are you Supporting Your Employees to Overcome Hurdles?

By Cathie Leimbach • September 8, 2026
For weeks, Mary had been frustrated with frequently occurring delays in shipping. During her one-on-one with her supervisor, she finally told him what was going on. He listened, asked questions, and said he would look into it. She left the meeting feeling encouraged. Maybe this situation would finally get resolved. A week later, her supervisor started their one-on-one by asking “So, what do you want to talk about today?” He didn’t mention what he had learned about the problem in shipping. “Of course not!,” she thought. “Nothing is going to change.” So, she sadly replied, “Nothing really. Everything’s fine.” Sometimes employees stop talking because experience has taught them that speaking up doesn’t make any difference. One-on-ones are an opportunity to change that. Give the employee a voice in what gets discussed. Help them address bottlenecks. Follow-up on your to dos from the conversation. It can be as simple as: “Last week we talked about the shipping problem. I checked into it, and here’s what I found out. A possible solution would be this .... How do think that might work? ... What other ideas do you have?” The message is clear: I heard you. I remembered. What you have to say matters. And when employees believe their concerns and ideas matter, they’re more likely to keep speaking up. Conversation is Where Leadership Happens™ What Workplace Conversation Are You Struggling With? Maybe an employee has stopped talking. Maybe you’re dealing with accountability, conflict, attendance, performance—or simply a conversation you’re not quite sure how to approach. Bring it to the FREE Workplace Conversations Clinic on September 21. Join Cathie Leimbach and other leaders to talk through real workplace people challenges, hear different perspectives, and get ideas for moving forward. Register Here