Great Coaching Doesn't Focus on Giving Advice

Cathie Leimbach • April 26, 2022

A leader’s job is to support their employees to success. This includes ensuring employees are clear on what is expected of them, sharing important information, and developing necessary skills. It also includes providing positive feedback to encourage employees in what they are doing well and to kindly provide corrective feedback to help them perform even more effectively.

Leaders worth following also coach employees from being dependent on them, to being independent, to being interdependent with their colleagues.


Guiding employees to be independent and interdependent requires leveraging their knowledge and skills for diverse tasks and a variety of circumstances. This requires that leaders help their employees expand their understanding of how to apply their knowledge and skills as they are assigned new tasks and asked to work on different challenges. This increases individual job satisfaction, team morale, and organizational results.


Yet, many leaders have a tendency towards micromanagement such as telling people specifically how to do each new task and regularly solving problems for them.  When leaders learn how to support and trust experienced employees to handle day-to-day workplace variables independently, it frees the leaders to support others in developing their capacity and to address higher level tasks.


Let’s explore a coaching approach that positions leaders to develop employee competence and confidence, the precursors for independence, interdependence, and collaboration. When leaders use coaching skills they can guide their employees to reflect on their strengths and growth areas and develop the ability to apply their knowledge and skills in new situations. This involves having frequent 2-way one-on-one conversations with employees using open-ended questions and reflective listening. For example:


The leader:

1.      Asks the employee what specific, measurable goal or end result they are working to achieve.

2.      Restates the end result and checks with the employee if they have accurately understood what they said.

3.      Asks the employee what progress they have made towards this goal and listens carefully to their answer. The leader periodically summarizes what they heard to be sure she is understanding.

4.      Asks the employee what actions they still need to take to achieve the goal, periodically checking she has heard the employee’s intent.

5.      Asks additional questions to guide the employee to listing all of the significant steps required to achieve the goal. Only if the employee is missing critical elements of the work or is stumped, does the leader make suggestions of how the employee might proceed.

6.      If, and only if, the employee cannot fully develop their action plan themselves, asks the employee if they would like a suggestion. Only if the employee says yes, the leader shares their ideas. If the employee doesn’t want suggestions but hasn’t developed a complete plan, then the leader asks the employee to take some time to think about their action plan. Before ending this meeting, the leader asks the employee to set a date, time, and location to reconvene the conversation.

7.      After a potentially successful action plan has been developed, asks what resources, information, training, or help they need to achieve the goal.

8.      Asks how she, herself, can help them. The leader confirms what she will do to support the employee.

9.      Asks the employee to state when and how they should connect for accountability. The leader may need to ask further questions until a specific, feasible approach and time are agreed to. 

 

When leaders support their employees through such a self-discovery process, they build employee confidence and competence, as well as demonstrating that they trust the employee. This leadership style gradually, even quickly, increased employee engagement, morale, and productivity. 

By Cathie Leimbach • October 13, 2026
"I thought you knew I appreciated your work." Kate hadn't planned to say those words in a one-to-one. But when a team member told her, "I'm never quite sure whether you think I'm doing a good job," she was caught off guard. He was someone she relied on. He helped new colleagues settle in, handled difficult customers calmly, and often spotted problems before they got bigger. Of course she valued him. Then she tried to remember the last time she'd told him, and what she'd actually said. There was a quick "Thanks, everyone" at the end of a meeting. A "Great work" in a team email. But she couldn't recall ever telling him what she had noticed about his contribution. Kate had been worried about rising absences and a team that seemed less involved. Praise wouldn't explain or fix every issue. Still, this conversation raised a question she hadn't considered: how many people on her team were feeling their efforts weren’t noticed or appreciated? It's easy to assume people know we appreciate them, especially the ones who quietly get on with the job. We turn our attention to whatever needs fixing, and we don’t acknowledge the people who are doing good work. Meanwhile, people who never receive thanks start to wonder if they are noticed, pull back, stop offering their ideas, and start job hunting elsewhere. Try this week: Look for one contribution each person on your team is making . Tell them what you notice about their work and why it matters. Instead of simply saying, "Good job," try: "Thanks for staying ten minutes past shift change to walk Jamie through the new changeover on Line 3. She now knows exactly what to do instead of guessing." Three elements of meaningful praise are: Be specific. Name what they did and the effect it had. Keep it natural and proportionate. A quiet word can mean a lot. Recognition doesn’t have to be in front of the whole team. Let it stand on its own. Don’t add a "but" or a new request right after the positive feedback. Sincere, specific praise helps people feel seen. It builds rapport because you're showing you notice how they contribute, not just whether the task got done. And people are more likely to speak up and share ideas when they feel heard and connected to the people they work with.  Conversation is Where Leadership Happens™ How often does your appreciation go unspoken? Join our Workplace Conversations Clinic on October 19, 3:00 to 3:30 PM, live on Zoom. You'll practice giving praise that feels natural and helps people feel valued. You'll also have the chance to practice other difficult workplace conversations, from raising concerns to working through disagreements. Reserve your place here!
By Cathie Leimbach • October 6, 2026
“All good,” they said. But Sarah wasn’t so sure. In the team meeting, just two people did most of the talking. Team members who once offered ideas just waited for the meeting to end. Three people called in 'sick' on the day of our monthly planning and progress-review meeting. Today was just another day with her disengaged team. Sarah realized that whenever she asked others how things were going, she got the same response: “All good.” It never failed that within a day or two of what seemed like positive feedback, a problem surfaced. It might be that they didn't know how to proceed with a new project. Or they were trying to hide a mistake they made. Things definitely were not "All Good". Then, she thought about the questions she usually asked. “Everything on track?” “Will that be ready by Friday?” She wanted to know how her people were progressing with their work. But she had asked closed-ended questions, so she got brief responses that told her nothing. At her next one-to-one, she asked, “How have things been for you lately?” “Fine. Busy.” She almost moved on. But, instead, she dug a bit deeper. “What’s been making things especially busy?” This time, the answer was different. There were competing demands she hadn’t known about. A concern that had gone unspoken. And a feeling that nobody really talked anymore unless they needed help with something urgent. This one conversation provided important information. It gave her a place to start moving forward to improve engagement and results. If you can relate to Sarah's struggles, here are some tips to help you stay on top of how your employees' work is truly going. Absenteeism and disengagement can have many causes. We can't begin to understand them by accepting thoughtless answers. We need to create an environment where people feel comfortable sharing what’s really happening. Interpersonal rapport is essential. It grows through small moments: asking a thoughtful question, listening without rushing to solve a concern, remembering what someone said, and checking back. This week, try asking a couple of specific open-ended questions such as: “What’s been going well for you?" And "What’s been difficult?” Let the answers guide your next questions. Give the person room to share. Then, a few days later, follow up. “You mentioned the client report deadline was going to be hard to meet. How’s it going?” Then, "What help do you need?" When you take a few minutes for such check-ins, employees feel more supported than if you just ask, “How are you?”, as you are walking by. It indicates: I heard your concern. I remembered. I’m interested. I want you to succeed. Your team members are more likely to get involved, be honest with you, and share ideas when they feel heard and connected to the people they work with. Want to get more comfortable starting those conversations? Join our Workplace Conversations Clinic on October 19 to practice building interpersonal rapport through conversations that matter.  Reserve your place → [registration link]