5 Tips for Showing Empathy

Cathie Leimbach • January 25, 2024

Human beings are emotional beings. At work as well as in our personal lives, it is important that we feel respected and noticed as a valuable human being. People feel most valued at work when they have a trusting and supportive relationship with their supervisor and their team members. This includes feeling empathy from others.

Whenever people are troubled, hurting, or dealing with serious problems, they want to feel that others understand what they are going through and are concerned for them. When we show interest and support for a colleague who is facing a tough situation, we are showing empathy. Yet, many find it uncomfortable to reach out to others when they are experiencing difficulties.

Keven Eikenberry offers 5 tips to increase one’s ability to show others that we are concerned for them and wish to understand their situation and their feelings.

  • Lean In – Get close to the person by spending time together or verbally acknowledging you are aware of their tough situation and care about them.
  • Listen – Ask how they are doing or how you could help them, and fully listen to their response. What are their words telling you about their situation? What feelings are they expressing? What is their tone of voice, volume, or talking speed telling you?
  • Look – Focus your eyes on the other person. What are the facial expressions and other body language telling you about their current challenge and how it is impacting them?
  • Let Go – Let go of your ideas about how they could handle their current situation. Don’t take over the sharing time, not even to share details of your similar experience and how you handled it. Help them feel heard. Focus completely on understanding them and their current reality. 
  • Learn – Really learn how the other person feels and how they are responding to their situation. Learn more about them as a person.

Ask questions to show you are interested in learning more. Ask how you could help them.

Once you have used these 5 tips of empathy, the other person will likely feel that you care. If, and only if, their words, tone, and body language show that you have good rapport, you could tell them in one sentence that you have experienced something similar and ask them if they would like you to share what helped you get through it. If they say no, then don’t share. The purpose of your conversation is to show empathy - help them see that you care about them, not for them to listen to you.

Who in your life is going through a tough time just now? When could you support them with the gift of empathy so they know someone cares about them?

Feedback Isn't a Download. It's a Dialogue.

By Cathie Leimbach • July 14, 2026
Most leaders know they should give feedback. Yet many avoid it. Not because they don't care, but because they worry they'll discourage someone, create conflict, or say the wrong thing. Unfortunately, when feedback is delayed, vague, or avoided, employees don't feel supported—they feel uncertain. Research highlighted in a recent McKinsey Quarterly article found that employees who receive regular, specific feedback are significantly more engaged than those who don't. The problem isn't that employees dislike feedback. They dislike feedback that feels judgmental, unclear, or disconnected from their growth. The strongest leaders understand something important: Feedback isn't a download. It's a dialogue. When leaders approach feedback as an employee development conversation rather than a list of mistakes, people become more open to hearing hard truths and more motivated to improve. Effective feedback communicates two powerful messages at the same time: I respect you. I believe you can grow. That combination changes everything. The best leaders don't simply evaluate past performance; they help employees see future potential. Rather than focusing only on what went wrong, they provide feedforward —guidance on what someone can do to become even more successful. High-performing organizations understand a simple truth: Improvement requires input. The question for leaders isn't whether to give feedback. It's whether our feedback leaves people feeling smaller—or stronger. Feedback doesn't change people. Better conversations do. Download our one-page guide: 5 Practices That Turn Feedback Into Growth Learn five practical ways to make every feedback conversation more productive, more encouraging, and more likely to inspire lasting growth. Conversation is where leadership happens

Performance Conversations: Clarity Is Kindness

By Cathie Leimbach • July 7, 2026
Most leaders want better performance. They want employees who take ownership, meet expectations, solve problems, and continue growing. Yet many leaders seldom initiate performance conversations – and when they do, it doesn’t go well. Leaders often hesitate because they fear discouraging people. Employees, meanwhile, don't know if they are missing the target. This can be costly. Research highlighted in McKinsey's Courageous Conversations article found that organizations with strong performance practices are four times more likely to outperform their peers. Yet fewer than one-third of employees believe performance reviews actually help them improve. The problem is not just a lack of performance conversations. It's a lack of clarity. The article points to a simple but powerful distinction: separate the hardware of performance from the software of performance. The hardware includes facts, goals, KPIs, commitments, timelines, and standards. The software includes tone, timing, relationships, empathy, and intent. When leaders clearly explain the facts while delivering them with care and respect, employees become more receptive to improvement. Strong leaders don't judge people—they diagnose work.  They focus on behaviors, actions, and results rather than character. They clarify expectations, provide coaching, and create frequent opportunities for alignment. In high-performing cultures, clarity isn't viewed as criticism. It is viewed as support. As the article notes, "Clarity is a kindness, and ambiguity is a burden." Employees deserve to know where they stand, what success looks like, and how to improve. When leaders provide that clarity with dignity and respect, performance conversations become growth conversations. And growth is where better results begin. Download the Performance Conversations: Hardware & Software Checklist for Leaders and learn how to have everyday performance discussions that include opportunities for growth, accountability, and stronger results.